Writing is a muscle.
Someone said that to me. It may have been Kat, my writing buddy. Or it may have been Natalie Goldberg, author of the book “Writing Down The Bones”. A book that Kat recommended. I don’t have the time to check just now because I have my timer on. I’ve switched on my 10 minute timer you see. The length of time I have to talk to you today.
So, writing is a muscle. Therefore it needs to be exercised daily. I find this thought quite provocative. As you may know, I’ve picked up a couple of new habits in my life this year. One is called the healthy eating habit. The other is called the exercise habit. The latter means daily workouts, 6 days a week. So the concept of “writing is a muscle” is something I can fully grasp straightaway. An aha moment.
So my new writing buddy and I started to write to each other daily. (I will tell you our story one of these days) We are now in Day 21 of our write-off. It takes 21 days to form a habit. And we have just reached the 21-day milestone in our writing partnership. Funny (or is it uncanny?) how the universe moves.
We have a rule. We type headlong full steam ahead. No going or reading back to edit, no erasures. Unless of course auto-corrects or stubby fingers type a completely wrong word. We use English, Tagalog, and Bisaya. We send the raw material in its purest form. Profanities are allowed as often as we need to.
So, how is it? It’s been quite an experience. Much as in physical exercise, there is a chemical rush in writing. There is pain. Pain when you reach a barrier, a block. Breathless when you lose control, when you can’t stop. A new move, a new routine, a new cranny in your memory explored. When you recall images, feelings, smells and sounds. I was transported into a world nearly forgotten. Time travel. I travelled back in time. To the small town in Surigao where I grew up. See the father who died when I was 8. Heck, I saw my beloved stepdad again, the one who died two weeks after I moved to Sydney. I see my elementary classmates. The old Catholic school. My pain when I had to change schools in high school. My grandma’s old house. I can see it clearly. The huge ancestral wooden Revelo home that tilts funnily to one side. The old home that intimidated me. The matriarch who ran the Revelo clan whom I both feared and admired.
It’s intoxicating, writing all these. I went through a roller coaster of emotions. It’s cathartic. At times downright… confronting. I confronted demons. Old ugly demons. The ones I buried 6 feet under.
(The 10 minute timer’s up. But I’ll continue for a bit more.)
I can’t stop. Writing has now become a habit. I write every day now. Into my Evernote app. 10 to 20 mins each day. I let the mind go, I just let it rip. And I’ve never been happier. Someone has given me permission to be self-centred, vulnerable, vain, needy, angry, hurt… A gamut of raw emotions we bury inside us. To let it see daylight? Wow, it’s absolute freedom. Freedom! Thank you, my Kat, for showing me that I do have wings. That I can fly. That writing down my rawest thoughts will lead to self-realization. My new friend, Kat, she’s a gift. She’s held up a mirror to my soul. Well, not so dramatic as that, but you know what I mean.
Join me for 30 days in this merry month of May. I’m sharing this new found energy source. Call it another personal development phase for ChaR-g. You see since I started blogging in late 2009, I carefully scrutinize and filter my posts heavily. There is this gnawing fear of being laughed at, scoffed at and be called a know-it-all. All very normal fears. These fears held me back. But not anymore. I am braver today and I am going to share my passion with you. Because the Holstee Manifesto says so!
And oh, “Sharing is Caring” daw sabi ni Kat. And I say naman, “Giving is Loving!”
Chiqui Pineda-Azimi says
Charot! Charing! You are shining-shining!!! I am smiling-smiling! ^_^
My dearest Charina, precious writing buddy and PageOneBFF, words fail me now. I cannot express in mere words how much gratitude I have in my heart for you and I finding each other in this great big world. It’s late. But see…see how much energy I still have! Proof that when one follows her heart, her joy, the Light shines everywhere, sulok-sulok and ilok-ilok included! LOL. Here’s to the next one and one hundred and one million words to come! Charing-charing is winning-winning!!! (Haha…words fail me gyud! :*) Soundtrack to this comment: The Way I Am